It’s not something he’s demanded of me dildos, nor is it entirely for his benefit I don’t mind not getting off, but I’d like to. And considering that the only way I’ve been able to get off that DOESN’T take me an hour or so to do is to use a power shower, I think a vibrator might work. But then, that sounds so selfish of me to say, doesn’t it? But then, is it bad that I want to come with the help of my friend, even if I need something to at least get me started? And is it bad for me to decide that orgasm/sexual pleasure is something I should delegate to masturbation, while acknowledging that partnered sex might not do anything for me? And considering that I find it hard to get aroused when I’m by myself, is there anything I can do to change that, both when I’m alone and when I’m with him?.

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